Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Dear Charice,

Ok, first of all, I'm so excited that you finally have an album coming out! It's about freakin' time! Sheesh. You'd think they could get you some decent management after you've been on Oprah multiple times, Ellen a couple, and David Foster took you under his wing. I know you've been doing shows and stuff (hard to complain) but you have a gift that is noteworthy to the point that it really needs to be recognized worldwide. Seriously.

I'm kind of sad that you dropped your last name. I suppose the single name will help you move towards becoming iconic (Madonna, Cher, Beyonce, etc.) but Pempengco was just such a fun last name. It let us see your roots and more importantly, it was fun to say! Pempengco. I'll miss it, but oh well.

Let's talk about your single, Pyramid:

Ok, so what we've got here is a classic cliche, radio-friendly, debut single. Luckily, you're talented enough to salvage it. I've found myself singing it lately, so kudos for making something good out of only half-decent material. You've also got the typical video that kind of has a storyline and a guest (you're young, so disregard this but, the two of you would make GOREOUS babies. Come back to that remark in a few years) rapper. I'm not dissappointed, just a little concerned. I do have faith that you've produced a quality album, and I anxiously await.

What I'd most like to talk about is your age. This was probably somewhat out of your control, but your make up in the video makes you look like a Desperate Housewife. You're young and darling. Milk that youth for all it's worth. There's no need to sex yourself up when you have a better voice than anyone in the business right now. I still think of you as a 12 year old, since that's how old you were when I first saw you sing. Don't get me wrong, this is quite minor, especially in comparison to your peers. I just don't want to think that it's all downhill from here. Don't start feeling like you've gotta out-sex Miley and Taylor. You're beautiful, and you can outsing both of them to Mars and back.

Also, I know Pyramid has been doing well in certain kinds of clubs. I think it's great that you're working hard to promote it, but...really? You singing on top of some tiny platform (was it a table?) in a bar where they introduce cute little you as a female dog? You deserve better. You are still a minor! You are a prodigy! Humility is a quality we all strive for, but I think-in your case-you've got some room to demand. Get yourself on awards shows, talk shows, notable locations. Get some respect! If they're gonna introduce you that way, you're better off without them. I'm definitely not upset with you. If anything, I'm upset by your management and wish that they'd treat you with a higher priority. I think they're forgetting the audacity of the voice that they're dealing with.

Affectionately concerned,

Jon Low


  1. It wasnt her decision to drop her last name, it was WB..

  2. eriktreble (via Twitter)April 28, 2010 at 10:50:00 PM MDT

    Charice's single IS catchy. But I feel like it's somewhat not her natural voice. It doesn't have her usual rich dark timbre. :\