Friday, May 28, 2010

I Like My Haircuts!

Go watch "Jessica's Daily Affirmation" on YouTube for reference on the title.

So yesterday I went to Hair Play in Kaysville to get my haircut. This was my first visit. The management was kind of unprofessional. I would've waited maybe half the time if one of the ladies wasn't talking to some friend on the phone.

Anyway, when I was finally getting my hair cut, I was asked if I wanted the back to be "round or square." I've heard this question many a time before, but I usually just do a coin toss in my head and choose one or the other. The girl cutting my hair was EXTREMELY giggly, which is ok, but not my favorite, as you could probably guess. She was sincere though so I tolerated her. So when she asked me "round or square" instead of just choosing one or the other, I sat there for a second and said "you know, I don't really look back there so I don't know what it looks like." She erupted in laughter. Not just giggling for the sake of giggling like she had been ever since we started, she was bent over in hysterics. I suppose it was kind of a funny, trivial moment, but I guess something about it must have really struck her. I found her laughing to be so amusing that I started laughing, really hard actually. I am the opposite of "giggly" but those that know me know that when I do laugh, I laugh really hard and I cannot stop. We then spent a good five minutes trying to get a hold of ourselves. Every time she'd go to use the scissors, I'd start laughing again.

So, that made for kind of an awkward visit. I'm pretty weird.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Lost and Found

There's that line in that Aretha Franklin song that goes "when my soul was in the lost and found, you came along to claim it." I love that song. I sing that opening line all the time, but then I stop when I realize that pretty soon I'm going to have to sing that I feel like a Natural Woman.

ANYWAY, a six year period of my life just ended, yes, that. LOST is over. I watched the pilot episode of LOST when it first aired on network television. I truly have been with it from the very beginning. I'm sure you know plenty about this show, even if you haven't seen it. I don't want to waste your time with what I like or dislike about it, but I thought it might be important to share my thoughts on the finale.

Spoilers! Stop reading now if you're planning on watching!

So a plane crashes, everyone on board goes through all sorts of hoopla, finding underground hatches, evil people, an odd French lady, a psycho Russian, polar bears, a smoke monster, numbers, magnetic things, exploding things, whispering voices, and an all important and mysterious "light." The inital draw of this show was its mysterious nature. We as an audience were truly lost and the intrigue was like crack.

After three seasons, I came to ask myself why on earth I was still watching this show. We had virtually no answers. We didn't find out what anything meant, things just got more messed up. Just when we would think we'd receive an answer, they'd open another Pandora's freakin' Box on us. It was frustrating to say the least. It was Charlie's death at the end of season three were I came to my realization. This is a character drama. It always has been. We spend half of the time in "flashbacks" learning about how messed up these people are, and as much as I hated to say it, I was falling in love with them.

I was hurt when Charlie died and we had to watch Claire be a wreck over it. Hurley and Sawyer could make me laugh with one word. Kate was a murderer I felt for; I wanted her with Jack so badly, not Sawyer. I was grateful for Sun's logic. I was overjoyed by Jin's redemption. I hated Benjamin. I was intrigued by John Locke, then loved him, then was terrified of him, then had no idea who or what he was. I wanted to slap Boone and Shannon (there's a reason they died in season 1). I respected Sayid. I loved Rose's "friendly black optimistic advice." I wanted Desmond to be my best friend. And no matter how obnoxious he could be, I always, always believed in Jack.

So what if I liked the finale? Sue me. Don't get me wrong, I had plenty of cursing and nearly-punching-the -TV moments throughout all six seasons. I like to think I'm a heartless, cynical demon. I can smash bugs (or tell certain Archuleta fans to jump in a lake. Yeah, I just went there). I can loathe sentimental (A Walk to Remember, anyone?) stories.  But, I cheered when Kate gave Jack a face-smashing goodbye kiss. I really felt for Hurley. I forgave Benjamin. (Jumping Jack punch FTW!) I teared up with every single repetetive moment when the islanders remembered their deaths and their time on the island. I spent six years with them! Is it wrong that I'm emotionally attached to them? Or am I just weak? Or maybe I'm just able to actually recognize that art is meant to be interpreted and doesn't have to be black or white. Did somebody leave their intellect at home?

I've known since season three that we weren't going to get the answers. They threw the mysteries at us to keep us coming back for more. You better believe that they made them up and altered them as they went too, but that doesn't undermine the depth of these characters and the brilliant performances from the actors  portraying them.

Lost's biggest reveal of them all came as Jack remembered his death and was about to enter the church. He asked his father what the purpose of it all was. His father replied:

"To remember. And to let go."

Yeah, super cheesy, but I fell for it. I love the characters. I can't help but believe that I will have my own church scene at the end of my life. I will be with those that changed me. I will be grateful for my memories, and I will have made it there because I was able to let go. I can't wait to hug them all.


Thanks Lost. Man, it took you long enough though.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Pet Peeve

Rant attack, prepare to be offended.

Wanna know how to make me really angry? Be a picky eater. You may think I'm being funny, I am dead serious.

My dad recently returned from a two week tour of Asia with his MBA program. They went to Korea, Japan, China, and Thailand seeing businesses, meeting with alumni, etc. Fun right? I love going to a new place, getting lost in the culture, seeing the world in a completely different light, and trying all sorts of new food. Well, apparently, by the time the group made it to Japan, over half of them had already pledged to live off of McDonalds. I thought he was joking...he wasn't.

The group was traveling from Osaka to Tokyo on the Shinkansen (bullet train) and their tour guide recommended that they buy a "bento" box lunch.



 These things are heavenly. They're boxes divided into multiple sections that could have any variety of different foods. Usually they offer some sort of tempura (a batter, usually with shrimp or vegetables), grilled meat (chicken, beef if you're lucky), tofu or pickles, and sashimi (raw fish); but really, they could have anything in them..

My dad bought the sampler box, a good $15 worth of food to eat on the train because he was hungry and of course, most of the people with him followed suit, not knowing what anything else on the menu was. When they sat down on the train, my dad immediately started eating and was of course, in heaven. Seriously, these lunches are so good. The person across from him however, opens their box, looks in it, and then shuts it. They then say "there's a tentacle in it." My dad replies "yeah, it's food." They then argue for several minutes about why they can't eat it until eventually my dad reaches over to their box, grabs the baby octopus, pops it in his mouth and eats it while everyone in the group screams,  and everyone in the train stares at them as if something horribly wrong is happening. Everyone thought my dad was "gross." "Ew, he'll eat anything" they'd say. Another girl who ordered a different box said "mine tastes good because it's chicken." She stopped eating it when she found out it was eel. Everywhere they went to eat throughout the trip, the group would receive their food, poke at it saying "ew, what is this?" and then throw it away.

And we wonder why Americans have a reputation throughout the world as "arrogant"? It is blatantly obvious to me. People thought my dad was "gross" for eating food of a different culture. Really? I cannot stand when people claim to be open, tolerant, and culturally-accepting when they refuse to eat anything they are not familiar with. I have a very hard time keeping my patience when someone tells me "I hate seafood." Do you realize how broad this statement is? That's like me saying I can't touch "landfood." There is just as much edible stuff in the sea as there is on land, and just as much variety too. I highly doubt that I know anyone who has eaten everything in the sea.

Here's a lesson. Sushi. The word literally means "vinegar rice." Sushi is rice prepared with a certain vinegar. It is so commonly prepared with a slice of sashimi on top of it, that clueless Americans think that sushi means raw fish when in fact, I've had sushi with hard-boiled eggs, grilled chicken,  chocolate, hamburger, you name it. So, don't tell me you "hate sushi" when you really have no idea what you're talking about. Saying that you hate sushi is about the equivalent of saying you hate sandwiches.

And while I'm at it, the American sushi "roll" (Las Vegas, Caterpillar, Baja, Dragon, etc.) junk that's all covered in sauce is not even REMOTELY Japanese.

All in all, I honestly belive that you are practicing intolerance when you refuse to touch food based solely on its appearance or description. Go ahead, get mad at me, think whatever you're going to think, I'm not changing my mind. "But what if I gag, or it makes me sick?" you ask? Well you know what, maybe I gag when I have to eat a hot dog and jello salad at my neighbors house. I smile and eat it anyway. Food is a huge part of culture, no matter how you look at it. When you diss food, you're dissing a part of someone's cutlure. I may become very quiet when you start talking about how gross (insert any international cuisine here) food is, but really, I am fighting the urge to punch you. Sorry. Go ahead, be a picky eater, but don't you dare call yourself tolerant, when in truth you're not.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Sharing Time



I saw this on Ellen and then watched it ten times. I wonder what this girl dreams about. I want whatever she's on.



Yes.



This is a Mel Brooks musical, naughty jokes ahead. You've been warned!
This montage just makes me so giddy, I nearly squeal. I saw this show in New York two years ago and I will always associate this show with the phrase "Broadway Musical." In many ways, it really was your typical piece of musical theater. It's what you'd expect on Broadway. Everything about it was spectacular. It's based on one of my all-time favorite movies, the sets were monstrous, the special effects put my jaw in my lap, my lungs hurt from laughing so hard, the dancing was insane, everything was perfectly executed. I'm not a huge fan of "spectacle" shows, but when they're done well with material I like, I'm aboard.



This is both the funniest and most terrifying thing I've ever seen.



I just discovered this guy. So not fair.


Just cuz.



She is coming to the Hale Center Theater Orem in June. For those of you that are theatre illiterate, she's Audra McDonald, a four-time Tony Award winner. The Hale in Orem is 300 seats, basically a living room. I'm trying to convince myself to pay $149 to go see her perform. And I mean, it's not just like a front row seat to Broadway, it's being close enough for the Michael Jordan of Broadway to touch, breathe, and spit all over you. Oh boy do I want to.



She is one heck of a woman. nieniedialogues.com